dilemma

The thing I've been dreading has happened at last. I knew it was coming, it was just a matter of time. I've been offered an opportunity that's very hard to refuse, but brings a heckuva dilemma. Not to mention the tremendous amount of pressure that's being placed on a very confused moi.

What I'm really scared of is the idea of being so far away. An hour and a half is hard enough, now it's gonna be 8 hours away for heaven's sake. With actual visas and immigration officers in between. Weeks between visits brings enough agony, what more would months bring?

He's totally supportive, no question about that. We still have the same long-term goals, we're still going in the same direction. And for confidently reminding me that we do and that we are, I love him even more. He's worried of course, but like he said, we always knew this was coming. We're used to it, it's not like we haven't spent time apart. Our relationship was born and raised in distance. And we're practically masters at abusing technology to cope with our situation. Even before it all started, we were already experts. We managed to bridge a 12-hour time difference without really committing to anything, how bad can a 4-hour difference be?

And that's the ultimate question...how bad can it be? Is a substantially higher compensation and potentially bigger savings worth it? There are other perks of course- my family together in the same country again after more than a decade, an opportunity to work and live in the so-called "Manhattan of the Middle East," a challenging job- but I'm still finding it hard to weigh things. It's just really scary to think of the possibility that an answer to a fervent prayer can still be revoked by circumstance.